I believe in signs: meaningful signals, inner nudges, and road signs are all hints I follow. So, I was well aware of the ones that manifested recently. To be honest, they were more like billboards. The inconsistent periods, the major mood swings, and the strangest one—I couldn’t tolerate my husband’s “yummy noises” while eating. I may have noticed these markers, but with my brain fog I promptly forgot them. Perimenopause had arrived.
A recent perimenopause study reveals that approximately 2 million women in the US enter perimenopause annually, and that means for millions of women, the hormonal veil has lifted. We’ve discovered we’re too nice, too stressed out, and now way too warm. So, join me for a hot minute in the land of parenting and life-ing through this hormonal shift where we don’t care as we once did and the AC is always on.
Here are 5 signs perimenopause is here:
1. Mood swings
“Thank you for being such a consistent friend,” my girlfriend said at lunch. I smiled because she understood how high a compliment that was. Consistency builds trust, and it’s something I’ve sought to build in my parenting and my relationships. Until now.
My day can be perfectly normal, and then my hormones interrupt it with a frustration reserved only for those who can’t properly fold a fitted sheet. Counter top clutter sends me railing, followed up by a deep sadness because my son is taller, and due to my lack of bone density, I’m shrinking.
I have no tolerance for, well…anything. (Especially the dude behind me talking too loudly on his phone in public.) I’ve resorted to the deep breathing I learned in my labor and delivery class to move through big feelings—or pass out.
2. Body odor
Sure, there were perimenopause symptoms I’d heard about, but smelling like a teenage boy, was not one of them. I’ve tried different deodorants, soaps, and body splashes even resorting to the Sun Ripened Body Spray from Bath and Body Works—in its day, this scent could fill entire rooms with one small spritz. Nothing works.
My personal odor seeps through mere minutes after I shower, and I’m stuck with myself all day. I’m hoping this is a phase and I’ll eventually stop smelling like I just came from a CrossFit/Pilates/eating 7 cloves of garlic session. If not, then the good news is my room smells like raspberries.
3. Noise tolerance
It’s been said that perimenopause intensifies emotions, but does it also amplify sounds? When I was pregnant, I developed super hearing and could hear my neighbors talking about their mother-in-law from their kitchen next door. That subsided after I gave birth, but it’s back with a twist.
Too much noise or loud talking sends my nervous system into overload. I can’t think straight and can feel my entire body tense trying to tune it all out. I’m constantly asking my husband and son to turn down the TV, turn down the music, and turn down themselves.
4. Brain fog
What was I talking about?
5. Sleep disruptions
When I was pregnant, a mom friend whispered, “Enjoy sleeping, because you’ll never sleep through the night again.” I had no idea her eerie prophecy had to do with moving from the newborn stage into the perimenopausal stage.
One minute I’m getting no sleep because I’m up feeding my newborn at 3 in the morning, and the next, I’m up feeding myself at 3 AM. Not only can I not sleep, but I’m so hungry I could eat the entire contents of our refrigerator. The good news is, everyone is sleeping so it’s finally quiet—except for the rumbling of my stomach.
Perimenopause for moms
Hormonal shifts are no joke. They affect life in a way we’re only just beginning to talk about, and with a shift as huge as perimenopause, we should be screaming the symptoms from the roof tops. Or at least, until we all become too overstimulated to handle the loud noises.
